OH XEREX! - Araw ng Natsuging Kuko

So ahh..hiya ako to kwento sayesh and to mandalang humanity this kwento making me pahiya ever! Tanda how during Day of the Dedo (aka. Tsugis) we signifying to those sleeping underneath lupain that we gunita their presence? We pamisa with the pari from our barrio, we sindi kandilas and we iwan flowers fresh from Dangwa. Oh and, thunder cats luto food for sleeping jowas to avoid ulcer. Sweet noh?!

Last Dedo Day, my angkan planned to gawa together what we always gawa together. You know, pahid grandpapang’s antique quarters, play tongits with his neighbor’s angkan and have the langaw lafang our legs to pieces. Kaso, tadhana (or some lamang lupa, midget sa punso or some pasaway kalahi of those special people) had other balak.

Pinakalast day of October made sapit so the family made daos a mini-reunion na. Some shongits jonta for tax free lafez and pagliliwaliw, i.e. Teta. She’s tanyag for being maingay and majoke to her friendships.When you salubong her sa may bangketa, you might isip you’re making titig to Frusty da Niyebewoman (gayagaya to Frusty d Isnowman), Teta’s fez is laging grabe ang funda.

However, she made me gulantang that day. Her sinetch itez self wanted to chenelu natsugi na toenails in the paa! I didn’t unawa how it got hantong to that. I isip tuloy that Teta wanted to gunita the Undas spirit of tigok and resting OR maybe she was humuhugot from her `self experience. You know..suffering from post-pangungulila sa patay na kuko syndrome.

Of course, I made okray agad her thought of the day. I am no L-U-Z-E-R. We can daldal about many other bagays until our laway was panis like…hmm…*crickets*… nevermind. Basta! Super raming things we could usap about but natsugi nails ain’t one.

But, because of my mapagbigay self, wiz ko kinaya to say no for that long kay otokwa. Hay, I hate that about me lagi. I’m too giving. Back to my kwento, nakasali na rin myself in their usapan. I thought kasi it won’t be tagal before I make them change their isip to talk about…*crickets*…too rami to mention.

‘Shoray! Nsugi ba si Nail?’ Ask sa ‘kin, yaya at druva ni hitad. ‘Sumakabilang buhay na si kuko. Anong ma-sesey mo?’ Ask niya ulit.

Later we made isip the iba’t ibang ways ng pag-kill kay little, poor toenail. Again, ulit, I subok changing paksa but unfortunately the madlang people there were already nakawit by Teta’s Q & A portion. Have to face this, although I am no luzer, it’s mabuti to paminsan chenelu about nothing instead of always seryoso: the nakapagpapaputok and important bagays in the world. Witerla lang para we can tawa once in a while and paka-silly ourselves.

Interested party ma-know ang results? Read ka lang, shinishare ko by myself ang nag-sell na ideas namin nina Teta:

(1) Rumarampa ang self sa kalsada at natisod ka sa majorly big bato dahil night na at walang ilaw. (Here pa lang, kinda naghihingalo na ang nagpapakasensitive na kuko sa feet. Ibang level na pangbubogbog daw ang gi-no-thru. Seeable na ang change sa kaniyang kulay at itsura.) After mapagpag ang dirt off your paa ay nagwalk ka na ulit, maybe dahil malas ka talaga (its the balat in your kasukasuan,) di mo na-notice na may pa-come your way na scooter sa bangketa. Plangak! Expect sa few hours ay mangingitim na ang iyong beloved kuko at mamatay ng lubusan.

(2) Mala-tipsy ka ‘day na naglalaro ng pantintero. Para ma-win ang palaro, nagmamala-may-spider-sense mag-move. Dahil sa ‘di natin know na kadahilan, unfortunate ka talaga sa life. Pabalik to base, you salpok with the patotot. (Buto’t laman versus jubis.) In your close encounter with that kind, all the heaviness was pasan by the kuko. And to patunay your bad kamalasan, he slow motioned the removal of his tone-toneladang feet. Condolence.

Did you see? What umpisa as katanga tanga turned to kalibang libang. Kaya if you locate yourself in a similar katayuan, don’t be frightened, breathe hard and magpakaasong-hangal. Wit pagsisisihan ang natsuging kukooness…malay mo maging butterfly pa yan.