BAYARAN PO - Bruha! Oo, Ikaw nga!

Alam ko ang aking powers bilang manunulot, and that is to spread the word to the whole wild world. Kaya naman nabrainstorm ko sa kaibuturan ng aking isip na dito na lang isulat ang message ko sa iyo. Wizz ka kasi reply sa text, sa Internet and kahit sa fez, parang, hello? Ano ako, aparisyon, sa ganda kong ito? Kaya friend, sana makarating ang message na ito sa iyo. Malakas ang signal sa pahayagan. (OMG, I’m, like, so taray! So galing my English-Tagalog dictionary! Anyway.)

Dahil mahal kita, Victoria’s secret lang natin ang identity mo. Itatago na lang kita sa pangalang – umm – Joke Joke Bolate. Pitong taon na kayong break ni Mic Ayoko dahil pinagpalit ka niya sa kataas-taasang presidentina ng org niyo nun, si Bokyang Manananggal. Kaya nama’t naintindihan ko kung bakit binuhos mo ang energy mo sa workness dun sa Compartment of Disagreeculture. Kahit miss na kita dahil hindi na tayo nakakapagshopping, foot spa, hair spa, okay lang.

Three years later, I heard from Mareng Panpil Olats-on na you made sungkit the funds daw of your org. P728 Million daw. I was shocked because, like, so yaman your org pala. Pang Malacañan level! Then I asked, ¿Por que? Panpil said na you said for fertilizers daw yung 728, since your org is, like, an environmental org, blah blah. Pero super wala naman na-change sa topography of the Sunken and the Lagoon, so people made bintang na you made dekwat the money for the campaign of Bokyang Manananggal when she ran for USC muse.

I texted you, but I was so gulat when I ran out of load doing so. You went to the States pala, so, bruha, that’s, like, P15 per text, ha! Sana nagpaalam man lang you so that I could have given you my wish list of our favorite treats from, you know, Escada. And Prada. But no, nada!

So there, you’re, like, there. You made AWOL because your immigration papers – este – filing for leave of absence was chaka daw. So people here in the home of Bora was like, come home na, like you’re making pahirap yourself by making deny na you did not save the trees naman talaga. But no, resist kung resist you. I was so concerned na nga e, kasi you’re gonna make harap the super admenstruation na daw if you don’t make amin what they accused of you.

Ngayong centennial, sinuka ka na ng States! Super bongga pa nga your entrance sa NAIA. You couldn’t take it, so you were hospitalized. Sinusuka ka na rin ng hospital, because you have sleep problem lang naman daw. Girl, how can you sleep when all that time you made pasyal Disneyland, so parang who would still believe you nga naman? Tapos you’re always making excuses pa not to attend the GA. Like, everyone’s saying, “Joke Joke’s soooo tigas ulo. Friendship over!” Tapos super dami nang damay pa, like those who made palit you when you flightzunged, and those who were under or with you sa Fertilizer Scum. All because hindi yung plants and the earth yung tumubo, but something else. Like your Louis Vuitton wallet.

I’m saying this not to make away, ha. I’m saying this as a friend. A true friend. *huuugs*

Pero kasi, hindi pa tayo post modern dito sa Panis, dear; the world can’t be contradictory! Super taliwas (o, diba, I’m so magaling in Tagalog na!) kasi your statements and your orgmates’ statements. Your work lang so no choice ba talaga or your discretion really naman? Nabigay ba talaga ang anju or not? Involved ka ba or wizz? In love ka pa ba or nagkataon lang ang lahat?

Basta. The truth will set you free, girlfriend. The truth will set us free. Love you! Mwahugs! *wink*